Shame of a Nation: Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte

I have seen a lot of movies. Unfortunately, some of them have starred Hilary Duff or were directed by Zach Braff. So, here is my contribution to the ultimate shame list. I swear each and every one of these is either owned by a friend or waiting for their turn on my Netflix list. I am still really, really ashamed to admit these. Here they are, judge away:

Gone with the Wind1939 (dir: Victor Fleming)

Why I should have seen it: Tons of awards, tons of pop culture references, tons of interesting old-timey racism, tons of dramatic love stories which is something I have a fondness for. (Titanic anyone?)

Why I haven’t seen it: It’s. Really. Fucking. Long.

The Usual Suspects 1995 (dir: Bryan Singer)

Why I should have seen it: Everyone else has. Tons of accolades and is constantly mentioned on “Top Ten Movies Of All Time!!!!!” lists.

Why I haven’t seen it: I watched half of it once. I think I fell asleep or was drunk or something. I keep trying to watch it and things like sleep or beer keep getting in the way.

The Shawshank Redemption – 1994 (dir: Frank Darabont)

Why I should have seen it: Awards out the ying-yang, Morgan Freeman, yadda yadda…

Why I haven’t seen it: It gets lost in the giant pile of Oscar-winning movies I am attempting to see before I die.

The Shining – 1980 (dir: Stanley Kubrick)

Why I should have seen it: I love suspenseful scary movies that are pre-Saw. It’s also a classic in the genre and an acclaimed example of fine acting.

Why I haven’t seen it: I was too afraid for a long time, and once I got in to scary movies I felt like I had seen it parodied too many times to enjoy it now.

Schindler’s List – 1993 (dir: Stephen Spielberg)

Why I should have seen it: It’s supposed to make me cry a TON and that means it’s a great movie.

Why I haven’t seen it: I never understood why I was supposed to. No one seems to be able to tell me what it’s about or why I should see it beyond my obsession with Liam Neeson.

2001: A Space Odyssey – 1968 (dir: Stanley Kubrick)

Why I should have seen it: A staple in the world of Sci-Fi, an apparently not terrible book-to-film transition, and it’s quoted all the time by everyone in the media.

Why I haven’t seen it: (See Gone with the Wind.)

The Exorcist – 1973 (dir: William Friedkin)

Why I should have seen it: A great and terrifying horror film that everyone says is the scariest thing they have ever seen.

Why I haven’t seen it: I was too afraid. I won’t lie, I’m still a little scared of seeing this movie. I don’t know if I’m ready yet.

Caddyshack – 1980 (dir: Harold Ramis)

Why I should have seen it: People name this first in most lists of their favorite Bill Murray movies, and Bill Murray is one of my favorite human beings.

Why I haven’t seen it: I have no legitimate excuse but that I saw Happy Gilmore and was totally over all things involving comedy and golf.

The Godfather – 1972 (Francis Ford Coppola)

Why I should have seen it: Everyone has seen this movie. It’s a pivotal moment in movie history and started a resurgence in the gangster-drama genre.

Why I haven’t seen it: Because honestly I am so scared that I won’t understand why it’s a big deal. I have seen so many movies influenced by Godfather that I am worried I won’t think it’s good and will be ostracized by the masses.

North by Northwest – 1959 (dir: Alfred Hitchcock)

Why I should have seen it: I love Alfred Hitchcock, so this is pretty unacceptable as most people say it is his best film.

Why I haven’t seen it: Because I am a poor human being and a shame to my family. Honestly, this is the one I am most ashamed to admit. I think it just got shuffled out of the deck and I was so much more interested in his more frightening films for a long time.

8 responses to “Shame of a Nation: Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte

  1. Seriously Charlotte? Shawshank Redemption?? 😦 WATCH IT.

    Also see 2001 so I can make HAL references to you… but I actually liked 2010 just as much.

  2. Stanely Kubrick

    Don’t feel bad about 2001. That sh*t is a snooooozer. I’ve tried more than once to see it and each time it puts me to sleep.

  3. I was waiting for a second list from someone just so I can say…See, my list isn’t so bad, look at this.

    Long isn’t always bad, but Gone with the Wind is the bad kind.
    Suspects should clearly be watched sober.
    There’s a reason Shawshank built up its audience over time.
    No beer and no TV make Homer something something…
    Schindler’s is a sobering look at the holocaust, but there are a lot more themes and ideas to make it not “homework”
    2001 isn’t 4 hours and should clearly be watched not sober.
    Exorcist, meh, I guess if you’re religious it might scare you
    Caddyshack, shame on me
    Northwest, classic, not Hitch’s best, but one of
    And Godfather, good god you need to see this, tonight. I’ll pay you 5 dollars if you don’t like this movie. If you don’t see it we’ll ostracize you more.

    • I’d pick Gone with the Wind over 2001 any day and I don’t need to be under the influence of anything to enjoy it. Also, Gone with the Wind’s 238 minutes doesn’t feel half as long as 2001’s 141. I don’t need to have an entire pot of coffee to stay awake for Gone with the Wind.
      And your opinion on The Exorcist doesn’t matter cause you haven’t seen it as an adult…

  4. Them’s fighting words!

  5. I hate the fact you used the term “pre-Saw horror” in defining the current era of horror and I really really hate that you’re right.

  6. I hate that I’m right too, Nate.

  7. In your defense nearly all of those movies predate you significantly, and with all the media we consume we have a lot less chance to catch up then are parents did (my mom for example, half her favorite movies are older then her, I doubt anyone under 35 has a similar issue).

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